Noisy Silence

It was quiet, like a void. It was a good size crowd in Jerusalem that day. I can’t say how many, but they were focused on the one riding a donkey. I can see them shouting but shouting is only noise. It doesn’t ring of truth and purity. There is only one person here who knows what is about to happen. He is on a mission. Everyone else has an agenda. They are singing, but there was no tune. They are throwing their coats on the ground and their hopes in the air. I try to call out with them but there is nothing to break the deep silence.

A different crowd now and yet there is a sameness to them. I can see their faces twisted in anger and hatred in the early morning sun. Too early for sweat, and yet many of them do. I know they’re calling for Barabbas and I need them to stop. I scream, but – nothing. The Son stands on the steps, quiet. Pilate stands next to him. Can’t he set him free? The silence washes over me like the water on his hands. It is as though I am drowning in noise and silence at the same time.

Silence is noisy. Ask anyone who is deaf. The brain creates noise to fill the silence. What we hear then is of our own making. In a truly silent environment, the only thing capable of making any sound is you. You’ll be able to hear your heart beating, your stomach rumbling and even the blood gently pumping through your head.  Usually these sounds are covered by external noises and are inaudible, but in the truly silent environment - it can drive you mad.

Scientists who have studied the behavior of subjects in quiet room experiments determined that too much silence causes the brain to look for something to listen to. It is what leads them to hear the heartbeat, breathing, stomach movements, or sounds that can make some people lose control. In such an environment you are surrounded by unavoidable nothingness.

Lacking truth our soul attempts the same action, compensating with noise instead. We fill our time with activity and the air around us with opinions, but it never seals the emptiness. I am simply creating racket of my own making. What I need to hear is truth. It is the only thing that will fill the silence with peace. As Blaise Pascal said:

“…he tries in vain to fill with everything around him, seeking in things that are not there the help he cannot find in those that are, though none can help, since this infinite abyss can be filled only with an infinite and immutable object”

The women came with only death and grief on their minds. These first to come to the tomb with Mary Magdalene all bowed their faces to the ground at first and missed completely what had happened. Mary was so sure of her grief, so wound up in her heartache, so afraid and troubled, so angry over what had taken place, so limited in her view of what God could do, that weeping, she did not see it.

And then the silence was broken. One word spoken in truth by the one who is Truth. “Mary.” All of the noise disappeared. The things she thought she knew were no more. One word, but it was filled with truth and love. “Mary.” One word heard from the lips of the Lord was all that was needed. She was free of the silence. Free from her own devices. Her own noise.

Quiet the noise, it means nothing. Listen for His voice. His word. The risen one calls you by name and when you hear it, nothing will ever be the same.